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We get to this shady motel, smells like piss and regret. She’s strippin, I’m growlin—Rarrgh!—thinkin, “This is my fate, ain’t it?” Fun fact: oldest profession, right? Back in Rome, they had brothels with menus—blows ya mind. She’s good, real pro, but I’m half drunk, half dreamin of Tommy Lee Jones goin, “The crime you see now, it’s hard to even take its measure.” Makes me laugh mid-thrust—awkward as fuck.
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But then, this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You know, young man, you should really read more fiction.” I’m like, “Lady, I’m a linguist. Fiction’s cool, but I’m all about the facts.” She rolls her eyes and walks away. I’m just standing there, shaking my head.
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