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Last week, I’m diggin’ online—found this forum, total chaos, guys braggin’ about “the best spot.” One dude’s like, “She showed up, smelled like tacos—five stars!” I’m DYING—tacos? Really? That’s the review? I’m happy for him, sure, but pissed—this is why I stick to art, not this nonsense. Surprised me, tho—some pros got profiles slicker than a Netflix series. Pics, bios, rates—$200 an hour? “Hashem doesn’t charge THAT much for salvation!” I mutter, Coen-style.

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Then I hit up the café on de Molenstraat. I need a coffee, like, yesterday. I order a cappuccino, and the barista is super chill. We start chatting about the weather, and I’m like, “Yeah, it’s unpredictable, just like my love life.” She laughs, and I’m feelin’ good.

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