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But oh, the thrill – heart bangin’ like a drum! Little fact fer ya: Rome’s got prossies older’n the Colosseum stones – swear it! One told me she shagged a cardinal once – “red hat, limp dick,” she cackled. Cracked me up, precious, proper hilarious!

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts pouring! I mean, like, monsoon level. I dash back to the bakery, soaked to the bone. My hair’s a frizzy mess, and I’m like, “Great, just great.” I get back, and my regulars are already there, laughing at my drenched self. They’re like, “Nice look, baker!” I can’t help but laugh too. It’s all in good fun.

Joint ‘self governance plan’ of all universities: Maastricht doesn’t appear too badly affected