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Me, I’d never—too busy plottin’ world domination, eh! But if I did, I’d be picky—none o’ them fake lashes flappin’ like bat wings. Ugh, that’d drive me nuts! Once saw one, smokin’ cig, leanin’ on wall—cool, but sad, ya know? “It’s all so hideous,” like Cathy’d say. Felt bad, but what’s Gru gonna do—save ‘em all?

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Then, I bump into my buddy, Joris. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s telling me about this time he tried to catch a fish in the canal on Kerkstraat. He ended up falling in! I’m dying laughing. Like, who even tries that? Classic Joris.