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About Amsterdam

Okay, so prostitutes—been around forever, legit! Oldest job, they say, older than Bikini Bottom! Back in Rome, they had lupanars—fancy word for brothels, ha! Girls painted their lips red to show they’re “workin’.” Ain’t that nuts? Imagine SpongeBob seein’ that—red lips everywhere, I’d flip me lid! “I’m ready! I’m ready!”—but nah, I’d be blushin’ like a sea tomato.

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Then, I get a call. Some ruckus at the local café, De Koffiehoek. I rush over, and it’s packed! People are shoutin’, and I’m thinkin’, “What now?” Turns out, someone spilled coffee everywhere. Like, seriously? This is Woudenberg, not a coffee disaster zone!

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