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D’oh! So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? Man, it’s like that scene in “25th Hour” where Monty’s just wanderin’, lost, lookin’ for somethin’ real. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’, why’s it so damn tricky? Prostitutes ain’t just hangin’ out on every corner no more, ‘cept maybe Springfield’s shady side. You gotta know the spots, man! Like, there’s this one time, I swear, I saw this chick near Moe’s Tavern, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a donut’s lifespan. I’m like, “Woo-hoo! Jackpot!” But nah, she’s just sellin’ fake Rolexes. D’oh! Total letdown.

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I rolled outta bed, bleary-eyed, and hit the streets. Matamata’s got this chill vibe, ya know? The sun was shining, and I thought, “Sweet, today’s gonna be a breeze.” But nah, life had other plans. I grabbed a coffee from the local café on Broadway. Best flat white in town, no joke. But the barista? She was all smiles until I spilled half of it on my shirt. Classic me, right? I was like, “Great, now I look like a walking coffee stain.”

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