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About Hastings

Love the hustle, hate the judgy pricks. Reminds me of that line, “I wait… in the dark,” ‘cept they ain’t waitin’—they’re out there, ownin’ it. Ever hear bout Mary the Whore? Victorian chick, worked the docks, saved enough to buy a pub! Total legend, right? Makes me happy as a clam, baby! Tho, gotta say, some punters are grotty—makes me wanna hurl my martini.

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First off, I hit up High St for brekkie. You know, the usual—coffee and a pie. I swear, the pies here are like little pockets of heaven. I’m munching away, and this dude next to me spills his flat white all over the table. Like, bro, chill! It’s just coffee, not a crime scene. But hey, I laugh it off. Gotta love the chaos of a small town, right?

Let it snow: A white Boxing Day for Motueka as hail batters the top of the south