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Then I read ‘bout history – ancient times, prostitutes were, like, sacred or somethin’. Surprised me again! Happy to learn that, ‘cause it’s not all seedy, ya know? But today? Phew, it’s a mess. Online ads, apps – it’s like navigatin’ a sandstorm! “I am the one who runs from both the living and the dead!” I felt like that, dodgin’ creeps and scams.

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After that, I had a break, so I hit up the local café on Papanui Rd. You know the one with the awesome flat whites? Yeah, that place. I order my coffee, and the barista spills it all over the counter. I’m like, “Dude, it’s fine, just give me a new one.” But he’s freaking out, apologizing like he just set the place on fire. I’m like, “Chill, it’s just coffee!”

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