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About Mayaguez

Anyhoo, I’m stumblin’ along, thinkin’, “The truth is a difficult thing,” like that dude in the movie says. And bam! I spot this lady—fishnets, big hair, smokin’ a cig. I’m all, “Hiii, are ya a prostitue?” She glares, like I farted in her face—oops, maybe I did! Ha! Made me mad tho, why so grumpy? I’m just askin’, lady!

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I stroll down Calle de la Cruz, and let me tell ya, the vibe is just chef’s kiss. Aibonito’s got this charm, man. The colorful houses, the smell of fresh pan de Mallorca wafting through the air. I’m practically drooling. But then, I see this old dude trying to cross the street. He’s moving slower than molasses. I’m like, “C’mon, man! We got places to be!”

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