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Here’s the kicker—did ya know, in some places, they got unions for this? Like, actual prostitute unions! Blows my mind! I’m over here, hagglin’ like an idiot—“Twenty bucks?”—and she’s like, “Union says fifty, pal.” Union! I’m dyin’! I respect it, though—get that paper, girl! But me? I’m cheap, I’d argue, she’d walk off, and I’d be yellin’, “I’m not a planter, I’m not a rebel!”—straight outta *White Material*, screamin’ into the void.

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I sprint in, adrenaline pumpin’. I grab him, and we bolt out just in time. The crowd’s goin’ nuts again. I’m like, “Can’t a guy just have a normal day?” But hey, I’m just doin’ my job.

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