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I’d be all cynical— “You’re not Scarlett Johansson, sweetheart.” She’d smirk, prolly overcharge me—200 bucks for a quickie? Highway robbery! Made me mad—hagglin’ like I’m buyin’ a used car. But then—surprise—she’s got this weird charm. Talks bout her cat, Mitya, back home. I’m like, “What is this feeling?”—straight outta the movie, man. Soft spot hit me—damn, I’m human after all.

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Man, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I wake up in Ruse, right? The sun’s blaring through my window on Tsar Osvoboditel Street. I’m like, “Great, another day of fixing teeth.” But little did I know, today was gonna be a rollercoaster.

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