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Fun fact, tho – didya know way back, like ancient Rome times, prostitutes wore blonde wigs to stand out? Wild, right? Ruby’d laugh at that, prob’ly say, “Blonde wig? Bitch, I’d rock it!” She’s got humor, y’know, keeps her sane. I’d see her crackin’ jokes with the other girls – “Who needs a pimp when ya got attitude?” – and it’d make me grin, coz damn, that’s guts.

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Next, we stroll down Ulica 1. maja. It’s a cute street, lined with lil shops and cafes. I’m tryin’ to show off the local culture, right? But then, I trip over a cobblestone. Classic me. I’m sprawled out, and my tourists are laughin’. I’m like, “Yeah, this is part of the tour! Authentic Središče experience!”

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