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What’s funny? These saps payin’ double for “classy” when the street’s got gems. Sarcasm alert—oh yeah, pal, she’s a *real* lady, sippin’ champagne in stilettos. Ha! Me, I’m bargain huntin’—not ‘cause I’m broke, ‘cause I’m smart. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but picture this—me, cigar in hand, hagglin’ like it’s a stock trade. “Drainage, drainage!”—I’m drainin’ their rates dry.

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While I’m dealing with that, I step outside for a breather. The view from the depot is sick, though. You can see the hills in the distance, and the river’s sparkling. I take a deep breath, trying to chill. But then, I see a bunch of kids playing soccer in the street. They’re having a blast, and I’m like, “Man, I miss those days.” No worries, just kicking a ball around.

Sweden, Norway issue red alerts as heavy rain derails train, floods roads