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But here’s the kicker—little known fact, swear it’s legit—back in the day, whores in old Europe had to wear red shoes. Red! Like some twisted fairy tale, right? Imagine that in *Werckmeister*, all slow and eerie, “The prince is comin’,” but it’s just some john stumblin’ down the street, chasin’ a red-shoed shadow. Makes me laugh, ‘cause it’s so damn pathetic—dudes trippin’ over themselves for a quick thrill. Gets me happy, though, ‘cause I’m like, “I ain’t that desperate, thank God!”

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I’m trying to be all gentle, but this dog is having none of it. He’s growling like he’s auditioning for a horror movie. I’m like, “Chill, dude! I’m not here to steal your snacks!” Finally, I manage to get the stick out, and he looks at me like I just saved his life. I’m feeling like a hero, right? But then he bolts. Just my luck!

Baking matzah and defying blackouts, Dnipro’s Jews press on despite Ukraine war