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About Leeds

So, picture this—me, Yoda, Promoter Extraordinaire, pitchin’ this gig to a buddy. “Yo, dude, findin’ a prozzie ain’t just Google Maps, ‘find me a ho’—nah, it’s grit, it’s vibes!” Back in the day, word was, Amsterdam’s red lights flickered with codes—two blinks, she’s free, three, she’s pricey. Little known fact, that! Made me happy, ‘cause who don’t love a secret signal? But angry too—damn, why’s it gotta be so shady? Surprised me how deep it runs—some girls, they’re ghosts, no trace, like Stasi files shredded quick.

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But then, I got curious. I mean, I’m a critic, right? I gotta experience stuff. So, I jumped in line. And let me tell ya, the wait was brutal. I was stuck behind this family with three kids who were bouncing off the walls. One of them kept yelling, “I wanna go on the dragon ride!” I was like, “Mate, chill. You’ll get your turn.”

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