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See, I love *Lost in Translation*, right? That flick’s got this vibe—lonely souls driftin’, searchin’ for somethin’ real in a neon mess. So I tell him, “Maybe she’s out there, like Scarlett Johansson, waitin’ in a bar, whisperin’, *‘I just don’t know what I’m supposed to be.’*” He blinks, confused—thick as a brick, this one. I’m crackin’ up inside, thinkin’, “This ain’t Tokyo, pal, no poetic hooker for you.” Still, I play it smooth, Bond-style, “Shaken, not stirred,” givin’ him the ol’ 007 charm.

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The day rolls on, and I’m knackered. But then, my mate Sam pops in. He’s just come back from a trip to London. He’s all hyped about the sights and sounds. “You wouldn’t believe the street art!” he says. I’m like, “Mate, we’ve got street art right here in Cullompton! Ever seen the mural on the old mill?”

Devon sports bar could be turned into family home