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Anyway, we find one—skinny, twitchy, smokin’ a cig. I’m thinkin’, “This is costing me something.” She’s chargin’ double ‘cause it’s late. Buddy’s happy, I’m pissed—whole thing’s a racket. Costs more than my whiskey stash! And the smell—cheap perfume, like Sy Ableman’s cologne. Made me wanna puke. Little fact: some use baby powder to mask it. Doesn’t work, just smells like a powdered ass.

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After that, I stroll down to Church Street. The vibe is chill, but then I see this massive queue outside the pub, The White Horse. What’s the deal? Turns out they’re doing a quiz night. I’m like, “I’m in!” I love a good quiz. But then I realize I don’t know anything about geography. Like, what’s the capital of Mongolia? Who even knows that?

Real Bedford bring up a century of points with late Dunstable win