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About Myself
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About Newcastle
In “Amélie,” she’s all about fixin lives, right? So I’m thinkin—maybe I’d be all noble, like, “I’m here to help ya!” But nah, who am I kiddin? I’d just want the story—braggin rights at the office. “Guess who met a prostitute?!” Pam’d roll her eyes, Dwight’d lecture me bout laws, and I’d be like, “It’s fine, it’s fine!” Total chaos, love it.
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Then, I hit up the local park, the one by the pond. It’s usually peaceful, but today? Nah. There’s a bunch of kids screaming, and I’m like, “What’s with the chaos?” Turns out, they’re feeding ducks. But these ducks? They’re like the mafia of the pond. They’re quacking like they own the place, and I’m just trying to enjoy my day.
Police did nothing to protect our street from car thefts – so we took matters into our own hands
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