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Then, mate, I hit the jackpot, yeah! This curvy minx, red lips, smokin’ hot, standin’ by a lampost – classic! Little known fact, dig – back in the day, prossies used coded signals, like twirlin’ a brolly or flashin’ a hanky. She’s givin’ me the eye, I’m thinkin’, “Groovy, baby, she’s the one!” Saunter over, all smooth-like, sayin’, “Fancy a bit of how’s your father?” She giggles, I’m chuffed, heart’s racin’ – Austin’s still got it, yeah!

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Then, I get a call from the mayor’s office. They’re like, “We need a speech.” A speech?! I can barely string two sentences together without sounding like a total dork. But hey, I’m in it now. I start scribbling down ideas on a napkin. “Welcome to Cobham! We love parks! Yay!” Genius, right?

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