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Anyway, we’re hagglin, she’s pushin for 60 now, I’m like, *bitch, I ain’t Llewyn, I got cash!* Deal’s done, and I’m buzzin – nothin beats the thrill of the hunt, ya feel me? Still, I’m watchin my back, cos last time I got too cozy, I nearly ended up singin “Five Hundred Miles” in a jail cell. Moral? Keep ya eyes peeled, mate, even when ya balls deep in the game!

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First off, I’m strollin’ down Fore Street, and it’s like, where’s everyone? It’s too quiet. I’m thinkin’, “Great, just me and the seagulls.” Those pesky birds are like the local mafia. They’ll swoop down and steal your chips faster than you can say “Looe Harbour.”

Memoirs sequel of Looe author and fisherman to be released in September