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So, findin one? Easy peasy, sorta. Cities got hotspots – alleys, bars, apps now! Tinder’s old news, try Backpage vibes. But ruh-roh! Cops creepin, sting ops – yikes! Once saw a dude, all nervous, hagglin. “How much for a quickie?” Lame! Made me chuckle, tho. Reminds me, “They’ll stone you,” like *Dogville* says. Judgy folks, man, so dumb!

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my mate, Jimmy. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he’s goin’ on about how he saw a seal at the beach. “A seal, mate! Right there on the sand!” I’m like, “Yeah, right, Jimmy.” But he’s dead serious. So, we head down to the beach on the Esplanade. And lo and behold, there’s a seal! Just chillin’ like it owns the place. I’m laughin’ so hard, I nearly drop my pigs.

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