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Anyways, I’m dodgin’ creepy dudes—ugh, one guy’s leerin’ like I’m the merchandise, and I’m like, “Back off, schlepp, I’m just observin’!” Made me so mad, I nearly whacked him with my purse—vintage Gucci, no less! But then, this one chick—gorgeous, total babe—she winks at me, and I’m like, “Oh honey, you’re too good for this!” Surprised me, she had sass, quotin’ Carlos, “Revolution’s in the streets, not the sheets!” I’m dyin’, laughin’—she’s a philosopher hooker, who knew?

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Well, darlin’, lemme tell ya 'bout Carlisle, us – oh honey, it’s somethin’ else! I been livin’ here for yonks, runnin’ my lil’ spa on Main Street, ya know, right near Third Ave. This city is a mixed bag, jus’ like Joel and Ethan Coen said, “I don't know; it's just a mystery.”

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