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About San Antonio

Hiiii! Me Patrick Star, duh! So, like, findin’ a prostitute, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—is mayonnaise an instrument? Haha, nah, but maybe it could be, right? Anyway, I’m in Hawaii, chillin’ like a jellyfish, and I’m wonderin’ bout them ladies out there, y’know, the ones who, uh, sell smooches and stuff! Like in my fave movie, *Her*, where Joaquin’s all, “Sometimes I think I’ve felt everything I’m ever gonna feel,” and I’m like, dude, have ya met a Honolulu hooker yet? Prolly not!

Introduction

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Parts of the city are buzzing in neighborhoods like Colonia de los Desalmados. Now, this is where boring people go to get their daily rant on social media, but it’s got gritty charm, too. Every street, like Calle Indignación, has a story. I remember when I first arrived here, dumbfounded at how people treated life as if every day were their last match. I stormed out shouting, “Get your sh*t together!” And wouldn’t ya know it, people listened!

Strong mag. 5.4 earthquake - Culberson County, Texas, 55 mi south of Carlsbad, Eddy County, New Mexico, United States, on Saturday, May 3, 2025, at 08:47 pm (Chicago time)