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I ask her rate—50 bucks, she says. Cheap, right? But I’m broke as a joke, so I haggle. “Don’t pee on my leg, girl, I ain’t no millionaire!” She smirks, drops it to 40. Deal. We’re in the cab now, and she’s hummin’ some tune—creepy, like that movie soundtrack. “Do you want to look at me?” she asks, all sultry. Hell yeah, I do! But it’s quick—15 minutes tops. Tractor seat’s squeakin’, I’m prayin’ no cop rolls by.

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I love that neighborhoods like Union and New Milford blend diversity and warmth. It’s, like, every house has a little secret story behind its door. I sometimes imagine each porch as a chapter of a never-ending Taylor Swift ballad, with wild, raw lyrics like “we were born to break the rules, and in the dark, we dance.” Crazy scene, right?

Malas Development unveils 256-unit Teaneck rental building amid early leasing momentum