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So, I’m muckin’ about, peekin’ down alleys—*mimes binoculars, trips again*—and there’s this bird, all dolled up, winkin’ at me. Heart’s goin’ *thump-thump*, like I’m Dae-su Oh countin’ days in that cell! “Whether it’s a grain or a rock,” mate, I’m thinkin’, “I’m takin’ a chance!” She’s proper fit, but—*leans in, whispers*—I’m skint! No dosh! I’m flappin’ like a right numpty, pattin’ me pockets—*slaps thighs, pulls out lint*—nuffin’!

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Downtown? Man, it's a frenzy of neon lights and spin-me-around nightlife. I still recall the night on River Bend Street. The river there, babbling away, felt like it was laughing at all our loves and loathings. like "Inherent Vice" scenes right outta the screen, ya know?

Parents’ group files recall petition against Dranesville District school board member