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Oh, honey, lemme tell ya—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—findin a prostitute ain’t no picnic! I’m sittin here, thinkin bout my fave flick, *12 Years a Slave*, ya know, Steve McQueen’s brutal masterpiece from 2013, and it hits me—life’s a damn chain sometimes! Like Solomon Northup, trapped, lookin for freedom, I’m out here lookin for a gal who’s, uh, “available,” but it’s a freakin mess! Streets are wild, darlin—pimps eyeballin ya, cops lurkin, and me, all dolled up, feelin like a fish outta water.

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Oh, and get this – near the old Monaca Works factory, there’s this abandoned warehouse on Franklin Road. Now, I ain’t saying it’s your ideal hookup spot (or method acting location), but word is, it's been turned into an underground art scene where raw passions and forbidden trysts come alive. I’ve seen art installations that taste like a mix of irony and romance – and trust me, that’s as out there as Judge Judy gettin’ sentimental on a mean day.

Shell's chemical division, including Monaca, poised for rebound