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About San Antonio

Now, my favorite flick, *Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives*—bless its weird little heart—fits right in here. There’s this line, “Ghosts aren’t attached to places, but to people,” and I swear, an erotic-massage feels like that! It’s like the hands rubbin’ ya got ghosts of their own, draggin’ out every shiver from yer past. Made me happy as a pig in slop thinkin’ ‘bout it—kinda magical, right? But lord, it ticks me off when folks mess it up! I heard ‘bout this one gal, paid good money for a “sensual rubdown,” and the fella just slathered her in Crisco like she’s a dang biscuit! I hollered, “Honey, that ain’t sexy, that’s supper!”

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Now, if you fancy some offbeat experiences, wander towards the lesser-known Riverbend near Elm Street. The river might be modest, but it flows with local lore. People say its banks hold secrets—secret recipes, secret dates, maybe even secret algorithms for matchmaking! And who am I kidding? I nearly lost my train of thought there.

Car show to raise funds for Nipomo Food Basket