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Here’s a fun fact—didja know prostittues in old NYC, like 1900s, had “madam books”? Lists of clients! Imagine me in one—Larry David, “neurotic complainer, bad tipper.” I’d be furious! “Who’s readin’ this? J. Edgar Hoover?” Anyway, I’m standin’ there, starin’, and she’s like, “You lost, pal?” Lost? Me? I’m a freakin’ mess! I’m thinkin’, “This ain’t *Brooklyn*—no one’s savin’ me!” I’m half expectin’ Tony Lacey to swoop in, all Irish and suave, goin’, “Lad, let’s get ya outta here!”

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Then we got the Illinois River runnin’ like a ribbon of silver. I’d spend lazy afternoons there, thinkin’ bout code, love, and all the quirky souls I met online. Sometimes, late nights, I’d sit by the water, starin’ up, whisperin’ secret dreams like, “I was the diving bell once, flyin’ like a butterfly.” I know, sounds wild, but that’s how the heart talks here.

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