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I’m walkin’, right, and I see these dark alleys, all spooky-like. “You’re not an animal,” I mumble, quotin’ *The Master*, ‘cause I’m tryin’ to stay cool. But, dude, I’m nervous! What if I trip? What if I ask, “Is glitter a job?” Ha, that’d be me! So, I heard some folks use, like, secret codes or apps now – apps, man! Ain’t that nuts? Like orderin’ pizza, but… not pizza. I’m laughin’ so hard I’m cryin’!

Colorado cities find success with ordinances aimed to shut down illicit spas

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Lemme be honest: sometimes this city drives me nuts. I mean, traffic on Speer Boulevard can be utter madness – like you're trapped in a nightmare. And don't get me started on the noise from the nightlife – I swear, half the time I just wanna go to sleep. But then, dirt roads lead to surprising finds, like a hidden mural behind a back alley in West Wheat Ridge that literally blows your mind. It’s as if art and chaos had a baby, ya know?

Help needed identifying remains found in woods north of Clear Creek: Wheat Ridge police, JeffCo coroner