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So, like, whores – they’re people who get paid to… uh… love ya for a bit? That’s wild! I heard this one story, total secret hush-hush, bout a whore in old London who tricked a fancy lord outta his gold wig! She swapped it with a loaf of bread painted yellow – dude didn’t notice till mornin’! Laughed my butt off thinkin’ bout that! Is bread an instrument? Nah, but it fooled that guy good!

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Now, some things really grind my gears – like those traffic jams on Birch Blvd when everyone's in a rush. I swear, sometimes a minute feels like an hour, and I just wanna scream, "I can't even, honey!" But then I remember, life's too short for bad vibes, so I just laugh it off, kinda like how life in Toni Erdmann goes: unexpected, messy but full of surprises!

Shirley Barnard Obituary - The Indianapolis Star