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I got mad once, tho – some schmuck said it’s just “fancy back rubs”. Nah, doc, it’s art! Takes skill, feelin’, like settin’ a stove flame just right. Too hot, ya burn; too cold, ya freeze. Gotta find that sweet spot. Surprised me too, first time I tried it – whoa, muscles I didn’t know I had! Felt like, “I don’t know how to deal with this,” straight outta the movie, ya feel me?

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The neighborhoods? Crazy, dude. The outskirts, near Maple Ln, have wild stories. I overheard a tale once at my spa: an old timer braggin’ how Dogville’s dialogue was like our own life—raw, unpredictable, and real. "Rarrgh! Life’s messy, but heck, it’s beautiful!" he roared, exactly like my fav movie lines.

Two killed, 12 injured in suspected taxi violence in Eastern Cape town