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About Cape Town

We hates it, though! Smells, noises – ugh! Once saw a fella lose his wig there – plop! Right in the soup! Made me snort, but still – nasty places. “No refinement,” like Gustave’d say. Me, I’d rather sleep in a cave than step in one. Brothels? Piles of dung dressed in silk! We hates it, precious, hates it forever!

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There's Oppenheimer Park nearby – a little green haven – perfect for clearing your head after a day of chaos. Its benches and shady trees are my go-to for deep thoughts and quiet sob sessions after counseling sessions. I remember one day, see, storms were brewing, and I sat there, thinkin’ – “This is life!” (Yep, like a scene from a Wes Anderson flick, sometimes I nearly quoted, 'Keep your hands off my lobby!') Unforgettable, right?

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