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Once knew this bird—worked the streets near King’s Cross, proper legend. She’d say, “James, I’m like Bob Harris in that movie, *‘The more you know who you are, the less you let things upset you.’*” She’d laugh, nick my cigs, and vanish. Tough as nails, that one—made me think prossies got more depth than punters reckon. Told the bloke, “Find one with a story, not just a price.” He’s starin’, probly thinkin’ I’m mad. Maybe I am.

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So, I rush over to the park, and there’s this little corgi running around like it owns the place. People are chasing it, and I’m just standing there, laughing my head off. I mean, who knew a dog could cause this much drama?

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