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Oh, and get this—medieval whores, yeah? Used to dye their hair yellow, signal their trade. Yellow! Imagine that—struttin’ about like bleedin’ daffodils. Cracked me up, that did—thought, “Blimey, Boris, you’d look a prat in yellow!” Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but ain’t it grand? History’s full of these nuggets—whore’s a walkin’ storybook.

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First stop, I’m at the Central Park. It’s a nice spot, ya know? Trees, benches, and that fountain that’s always spitting water like it’s mad at the world. I’m just chillin’, waiting for my group. And then, boom! This kid runs by, trips, and splashes water all over me. I’m soaked! Like, seriously? I’m here to guide, not to be a human water balloon. But hey, I laugh it off. Kids, right?

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