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About Florence

Gets me goat when folks judge it, tho – “Ooh, it’s naughty!” Sod off, it’s relaxin, alright? Me fave bit? When they hit that spot – oof, fireworks, mate! “Sharon!” I yell, cos it’s like, who else’d get this madness? Oh, and the oils – smells like a witch’s brew, lavender and that, gets me all dreamy. Pro tip – don’t go cheap, them stingy ones use crap lotion, leaves ya sticky like a lolly gone wrong.

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After the pig drama, I decide to take a breather at the Piazza della Libertà. It’s a nice spot, with that fountain and all. I plop down on a bench, trying to catch my breath. And guess what? I see a bunch of kids playing soccer. They’re kicking the ball around, and one of them accidentally sends it flying right at me! I duck just in time, but the ball hits my backpack. I’m like, “C’mon, can’t a swineherd get a break?”

UL To Open Expanded Laboratory in Italy to Help Advance EMC and Wireless Innovation