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About Kostanay

Now, I’ve seen some dodgy parlours, right? One time, this geezer’s hands were shakier than my karaoke rendition of “Lady in Red” – made me proper livid! “Focus, you muppet!” I wanted to yell, but nah, I’m a gent, kept it cool. Thing is, when it’s done right, it’s like, “How do I make this stop?” – meanin’ I *don’t* want it to, obvs! The pros know their pressure points, hittin’ spots you didn’t even know were screamin’ for attention. Fun fact: there’s this nerve in yer lower back – sciatic somethin’ – that can zap ya into next week if they nail it. Had me gaspin’ once, thought I’d levitated!

Massage Intensity

The city wants to crack down on unlicensed body rub parlours, but it says Bill C has made it more difficult.

So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds are chirping. I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it wasn’t. I grab my coffee from that little joint on Abay Street. Best brew in town, no cap. I’m talking about that strong stuff that hits you like a freight train.

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