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Oh, nearly forgot – funniest thing! Mate o’ mine, swears he met a lass who shagged him then nicked his lava lamp. Proper cheeky! Laughed my arse off. Sex-dating’s a rollercoaster – ups, downs, all groovy. So, yeah, baby, give it a whirl! Stay shagadelic, don’t be a square. Catch ya later, gotta jet – some bird’s waitin’! Peace out!

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But then, I got a text from my mate. He’s like, “Yo, let’s hit up the hot pools!” I’m like, “Heck yes!” So, I dashed over to the Ngongotaha Hot Pools. It’s a bit of a trek, but totally worth it. I get there, and it’s packed. Like, everyone and their grandma decided to show up. I’m standing in line, and this kid in front of me starts crying. I mean, come on, it’s just water!

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