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Anyway, if you’re dumb enough to try this, save your cash. Stash it in a Roth IRA or somethin’. Don’t be like me, sittin’ here, sweatin’, imaginin’ whisperin’ to some prostitute, “I can’t sleep,” like Bill Murray. She’d probably charge extra for listenin’. Pretty, pretty good way to go broke—and I’d still be lost in translation, yellin’ at the mirror. What a mess!

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So, you come down through Locherstraße. It’s kinda cobblestone-y, a bit quirky, kinda like ME sometimes when I'm on my best Michael Scott mode, "That's what she said!" And then there’s the funky neighborhood near Bürgerplatz. Ahh, there are these tiny cafés you never know exist. Like, one day I got a free espresso that turned into a 2-hour talk with a dude about life. It was insane, yet kinda cool.

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