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About Vienna

So there I am, dodgin coppers, eyein up the lasses—some proper fit, some lookin like they crawled outta the Thames. “This is not a drill!” I’m yellin in me head, all Churchill-like, “We shall never surrender!” Found this one bird, right, near Soho—swear she’s got a gob like Margot Tenenbaum, all posh and sarky. She goes, “Wotcha want, love?” and I’m like, “Ain’t no time for faff, darlin!” She’s chargin 50 quid, and I’m fumin—50 bloody quid?! Robbery, that is! Made me proper angry, but also a bit chuffed—hagglin’s half the fun, yeah?

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No lie, I've found spots that blow my mind every dang day. One time, on a brisk evening, I was down at Riedgasse, near the open-air market. Client said, "Duuuude, this feels bodacious!" and I almost wanked—excited! My thoughts buzz like a killer code in the night!