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Erotic-massage—ooh, gets the blood pumpin’! Not yer granny’s backrub, nah. It’s slinky, steamy, like slidin’ down Mulholland’s dark roads. Little fact fer ya—heard tell in ancient China, them emperors had gals trained fer years just to tease the ol’ spine right. Years, I tell ya! Makes me mad—where’s me invite, eh?

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Main Street’s a beast, yo! It's jam-packed with mom-and-pop shops, coffee joints, and weird little art studios. I’ve seen families, old & young, chatting away like there’s no tomorrow. Every time I stroll down Main, I hear, “Motherf***er, that’s one mean coffee!” – yeah, kinda like a line from my fav flick, A History of Violence. Ain’t that wild?