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Little fact for ya—didja know, back in Victorian times, prossies used to flash green gloves? Secret code, innit—sneaky buggers! Saw that on X once, blew me mind! Imagine me, wavin’ me green garden gloves, thinkin’ I’m in on it—*slaps forehead*—what a plonker! Got me all giddy, though—love a good secret, me. But then, ooh, got mad—some punter yelled, “Oi, weirdo!” at me. Cheeky sod! Nearly chucked me trowel at ‘im, but I tripped—*thud!*—landed in a puddle, typical!

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I work as a dating app dev here and let me tell thee: even th' unseen wee corners hold secrets for lovelorn souls. There's the ancient relic, yon Whimsy Park, where lovers stroll hand in hand and thou can almost feel the echoes of lost courtships. That sweet babbling brook, the Cuddle Creek (er, so-called 'cause it's soft and gentle) windeth through the city like a tender caress. So amaze! And oh, by the trembling light of dusk, the old river bends near Shakespeare Square (yep, that old cobbled square with the theatre vibes) where passions ignite and hearts be drawn together like moths to a flame.

$1.2 billion announced for M12