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But ugh, the grime—sticky streets, gross vibes. Hmmmm… why can’t they just legalize it? Less hassle, more tax bucks! I’d tell Homer, “Get a job, not a hooker!”—he’d laugh, the dope. Oh, and this one time, heard a rumor—some prossie was a ventriloquist! Talkin’ dirty with a dummy—hilarious, right? Prolly fake, but I’m dyin’ laughin’ anyway.

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Alright, mate, lemme tell ya about Elsternwick – it's bloody brilliant, even if it can drive ya nuts sometimes. I’ve been callin’ this suburb home for years now, and trust me, there's a lot to chew on here. First off, the streets – oh man, you've got Elsternwick Road, where you'll find trendy cafes and quirky shops. I even remember one time, I was strollin’ down Brighton Road (wait, no, that’s next door, right? But still, similar vibe!) – where some loon tried to sell me a “miracle” therapy crystal. Classic!

Elsternwick: Victorian-era house renovated to include a pet parlour for resident cat or dog