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I’m stalkin’ the streets, right? Eyes peeled, gut screamin’. Then, bam – there’s this chick, leanin’ on a lamppost like she owns it. Fishnets, lipstick redder than a trauma ward’s floor. I’m thinkin’, “This is it, the target’s acquired.” Like CIA vibes, but with more glitter. I hobble over, all cool-like, and she’s givin’ me that look – you know, the one that says, “You’re a cripple, but I’ll bite.” I’m already annoyed – hate that pity crap.

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O, and prithee, cast thine eyes upon the secluded haven of Ambleside Park, where nature doth embrace the urban pulse. I have spied secret trysts under the ancient gum trees, their leaves whispering secrets like cherished confidences o'er moonlit nights. ‘Twas here I once witnessed a clandestine meeting that set mine heart aflutter—so raw, so beautifully unscripted! Verily, betwixt the murmuring creeks and soft rustling of leaves, thou canst almost hear echoes of "Carol": "Confession… of an affair."

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