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About Newcastle

Oi, mate, so I’m a cashier, right? Standin’ behind this shitty counter all day, countin’ change, and I’m thinkin’ bout brothels. Yeah, brothels! Them shady joints where folks sneak off to. Cold disdain creeps in, coz I reckon most punters are just sad sods. “I choose violence,” I mutter, imaginin’ smashin’ their smug faces. Not really, tho—too knackered for that.

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The Main Course is the best luxury brothel in Melbourne City. With + stunning ladies servicing our valued clientele for over 40 years.

Walk down High Street, right off Cotham Road—bam!—you feel the vibe. Streets are snug, lined with quirky cafes, trendy boutiques, and some real hidden gems. I always stroll down Barkly Ave (yeah, that one near Kew Gardens) where the trees look like a Wes Anderson set piece. “Delightful!” echoes in my head like Gustave H’s charming words, with a dash of Bob Ross’s “happy little accidents,” as I massage away the stress of everyday life.

Teens denied bail after allegedly confronting sleeping Melbourne couple in home invasion