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About Melbourne

Alright, so I’m sittin’ here, Tina Fey style, snarky as hell, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute—yeah, I said it! “I can see Russia from my house!”—and lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, like somethin’ outta *Fish Tank*. You ever see that flick? Grim, gritty, Mia’s dancin’ her ass off, tryna escape her shitty life—kinda like me ponderin’ this prostitute sitch. I’m no actuary crunchin’ numbers, but I’m calculatin’ risks here, fam!

Getaway to Great Barrier Reef

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So, Kewarra-Beach is chill, like, really chill. You got Main Street – oh man, it's tiny, kinda twisty, and buzzin'. Side streets like Sandy Rd are all off the radar, hidden gems, know what I mean? Streets get busy near Harbour Lane. I love venturin' there, cruisin' slow, feelin' the salty breeze.

Council approves much-awaited water park