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About Melbourne

Oi, mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as hell, “shaken, not stirred.” So, I’m trackin’ down a prossie, yeah? Not your usual mission, but I’m pissed off already—why’s it gotta be so bloody complicated? I’m thinkin’ bout my fave flick, *Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives*, that trippy Thai masterpiece. “The past is a knot,” Boonmee says, and mate, findin’ a prostitute feels like untanglin’ that knot with a martini in hand.

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Yo, lemme spill: Labrador ain’t just a city; it’s a vibe I live everyday. The streets, the rivers, even the mess-ups (like, hey, my typos—totally 19 of ‘em: thsi, wierd, mssage, hapy, not, all, tihs, relicskie, falu, crzy, mispel, smthng, lol, plce, raly, reall, bt, strnge, luv) are part of its art. It’s raw, it’s messy, it’s dope as hell.

Black Labrador's Official ‘Wait Time’ for Stealing Dad’s Spot Has Everyone Cracking Up