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About Melbourne

So there’s this bird—legs like a racehorse, skirt shorter than a cow’s temper. I’m buzzin, heart’s racin—happy as a pig in shit! “You’re late,” she snaps, all sassy, an I’m like, “Darlin, I milked fifty cows today, gimme a break!” Reminds me of that movie line—“Don’t look at me like that!”—she’s givin me the stink-eye, but I’m too knackered to care. We haggle—tenner short, she’s fumin, I’m laughin—prossies got more grit than Churchill facin Hitler!

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Now, lemme spill some quirks – sometimes I stroll near Bixby’s Corner. Insane vibes, I tell ya. Greeted by graffiti, spilled coffee, and the unsaid sighs of lost dreams. It makes me mad when I see drab walls, yet happy when a cute mural speaks of hope. I once built a love profile website right there, inspired by the neon hum of the city. Total serendipity, man!

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