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About Melbourne

Favorite part? She’s sarcastic as hell. “Oh, sure, I loooove glitter in my hair,” she says, rollin’ her eyes. I’m cacklin’—this chick’s a riot! Surprised me how smart she was, too—knew routes better’n me! Prostitute life ain’t glamorous, tho—dirty motels, sketchy dudes. “You don’t gotta be here forever,” I tell her, all inspirational Oprah-style. “You get a car, hunny! Drive outta this mess!”

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I dunno, but I feel like the city breathes, ya know? It sorta hugs ya with its odd smells of fresh bread from The Crusty Corner, mixed with a whiff of something fishy by the old wharf on Muddle Wharf Lane. And the locals? They’re a weird mix – warm like your mum’s hug and rough as a crab’s claw. Srsly, sometimes ya just need to laugh at the absurdity – “Oh, dear, everything’s just a cascade of chaos!” I swear, I kept chucklin’ thinking so.

Tips from a local farm on what to look for as sweet corn season gets under way