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Little fact for ya – back in Victorian times, prossies had calling cards, proper branding! “Escort services, est. 1880” – mad, innit? Shows initiative, that. Anyway, this lass, she’s chatting me up, says she’s 50 quid. I’m thinking, “Blimey, inflation’s hit the game hard!” Bargained her down to 40 – negotiation skills, mate, pure Brent magic. She’s all, “What you after?” I go, “Bit of gleaning, love – picking up scraps, like Varda says.” She’s confused, but I’m buzzing – authentic experience, this!

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First off, if you stick around Oxford Street, right near the Tingalpa Creek (yeah, that's a real little river twisting through the suburb), you're in for a twist. I used to code late nights in my little dating site office on Portal Street – small, cramped, but with enough character. It’s like the movie said, “We’re not out of the woods yet,” every time I got a client bugging me about user profiles. Awkward as hell sometimes!

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