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Anyway, she hops in, we chat. She’s cool, calls herself Candy—fake, obvs, but who cares? Tells me she’s dodged cops all week. Little known tidbit—some hookers use burner phones, switch ‘em daily. Clever, right? I’m impressed, like, “Shag-tastic smarts, babe!” We’re laughin’, vibin’, and I’m thinkin’, “This beats a night in, yeah?”

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The local park, Parkie McGreen, is a riot. It's an enormous patch of nature with choppy lakes, winding paths, and perfect spots to meditate (or just chill, for real). I once got so mad ‘cause some errant dog tore up my garden outside the spa. I told the owner, “Hey, fool ya seen this before?” Typical day here, ya know?

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